• khatijadadabhoy

Stepping Into It…

I’ve said before that what is glaring to us in others is often a reflection of the same aspect within us which is in need of our attention and healing. This is no new spiritual truth. Those of us on the path have heard it many times. We often attract in or are attracted to people who mirror to us the very same issues we have and need to heal. The one coming up for me now is about not fully stepping into my power, particularly as a woman. I have made great strides in this area, don’t get me wrong, however I haven’t fully embodied it in the way that will up-level my life. The way I know I haven’t fully stepped in to my power and greatness is that I’m still attracted to and attracting in men that are not fully in their masculine power. Honestly, men who are fully in their masculine power intimidate me. That’s an indication I’m not coming from a place of authentic power myself. Another indication is that I have to admit I feel more powerful and together than the men I usually attract in, creating a situation in which I never have to develop an authentic sense of feminine power.


Stepping into our power can be challenging for those of us who weren’t nurtured in a way that develops a deep sense of confidence in our innate power.  Or, the events of our young lives sent us the message to stay small and/or invisible. We may have been without the benefit of guidance, ritual, or parental role models that would have lovingly ushered us into womanhood or manhood.  We are still struggling to grow those little boys and girls within us up and into powerful men and women. Now, we take on raising ourselves and we look for examples of those in our midst who are fully in their power, and we try to learn how to be women and men. At least those of us who are conscious enough to know what is happening within us are making this effort.

I realize I have had no sense of comfort in my own power so I shy away from it. I can therapize myself all day about why and how I have ended up here struggling with this issue. But the truth is, there comes a time to pay attention to the signs and to do something different. Given that I have done a lot to grow into my power, I am at the moment in time when I’m being guided to get to the next level. It means taking a more no-nonsense approach and  lovingly giving up the whiny little girl within who doesn’t believe in herself and who thinks she has to do certain things to earn love and attention. It’s time to embody the belief and the knowing on a deep level that all I have to do is show up, and my existence is enough to change the very atmosphere. To know that when I walk into a room, I am affecting the energetic vibration and it is felt. This is not arrogance or conceit, this is truth. It’s easy to spot those in the world who know this truth and live it. I’m fortunate to know some of these people and I use them as guide posts and role models as I get to the business of re-parenting myself in the knowledge of my own magnificence. It makes me think of the Maya Angelou poem, “Phenomenal Woman”, which I think captures the essence of feminine power.  Enjoy the poem and take a minute to feel your power, ladies. If anyone knows of a great piece of work that captures the masculine essence or power, please share.

Phenomenal Woman


Pretty women wonder where my secret lies. I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size But when I start to tell them, They think I’m telling lies. I say, It’s in the reach of my arms The span of my hips, The stride of my step, The curl of my lips. I’m a woman Phenomenally. Phenomenal woman, That’s me. I walk into a room Just as cool as you please, And to a man, The fellows stand or Fall down on their knees. Then they swarm around me, A hive of honey bees. I say, It’s the fire in my eyes, And the flash of my teeth, The swing in my waist, And the joy in my feet. I’m a woman Phenomenally. Phenomenal woman, That’s me. Men themselves have wondered What they see in me. They try so much But they can’t touch My inner mystery. When I try to show them They say they still can’t see. I say, It’s in the arch of my back, The sun of my smile, The ride of my breasts, The grace of my style. I’m a woman Phenomenally. Phenomenal woman, That’s me. Now you understand Just why my head’s not bowed. I don’t shout or jump about Or have to talk real loud. When you see me passing It ought to make you proud. I say, It’s in the click of my heels, The bend of my hair, the palm of my hand, The need of my care, ‘Cause I’m a woman Phenomenally. Phenomenal woman, That’s me.

© 2020 by Khatija Dadabhoy